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I'm afraidI'm afraid

I'm afraid of failure,
Of disappointing,
Seeing those ashamed looks on their faces,
Because I know I'm not good enough,
I'm afraid, very afraid,

I'm afraid of speaking my mind,
For I know that others will ruthlessly speak theirs,
And I know their words are going to hurt me,
But I won't have the heart to hurt them back,
I'm afraid, very afraid,

I'm afraid of the future,
Because I don't know where I shall be,
Or what I shall do,
I'm still trying to piece my puzzle together,
I'm afraid, very afraid,

I'm afraid of success,
For with this comes jealousy,
And with jealousy comes lust for hurt,
Nothing good can possibly
GoodnightClose your eyes
And say goonight
I say goodbye
For the very last time

I close the door
Say nothing more
Don't realize it'll be
My last goodbye.

You dream away
All your worries
All your demons
Lay down to rest

I don't pay attention
Don't notice your cry
For help
Take advantage of you
As you dream awayy.

I let you slip from my hands
Turned my back on you
Let you disappear

Now you're gone
I can't help but mourn
The death of my beloved.

You should sleep in your bed
Unconscious only in your head
Not asleep in the clouds
Where we can't be proud

They too
Shoved you away
But at least they would say
"I love you"

The l
Foreign EyesA plane arrives
hauling foreign eyes
whose confusion,
makes them seem unwise.
They aren't.

The different signs,
trick these foreign eyes,
that have never seen letters
drawn with crossing lines.

The new language puzzles the foreign ears
putting the brain in a constant shame.
Making the face look less than sane.

The foreign hands,
don't know how to exchange
a currency that's alien,
hungered mouth still yearning.

A foreign body now in shock,
questions hosts who are but cogs.
Sense of humor all but lost,
fear for safety, all forethought.
The PrisonWelcome to The prison
Your thoughts mock you through the bars
we left you in the sector of misery
and we took away all the guards.
You are here to learn a lesson
A lesson you do not deserve
But scream all you might
you will never be heard.
We will feed you Depression
Breakfast lunch and dinner
Than 1 hour of pleasure
Than back to reality.
Other inmates will talk
And threaten your very life
They will fill your heart with fear
and fill your head with lies
Your lawyer fights your case
because he thinks he knows the truth
but no matter what he tries
we all know that he will lose
Your doomed for an eternity
in this house of i
BeautyOnce upon a dream there was a boy
who whispered metaphors into his blankets
in the dead of the night. he pǝuɹnʇ them
over and twisted them and s t r e t c h e d them
searching for the melody that would define him.
what he didn't know is that his ears were traitors;
they rejected every rhyme without a trace of shame
and never allowed him to realize that his melodies
were real music, were beauty and love woven
into delicate threads; he only heard cacophony.
night after night he struggled and agonized
never satisfied with any combination of notes
always concluding that he was inferior to the world.
on the other side of the fence, close and far away
a girl with with stars in her eyes cried; her tears
were of the purest silver, the plainest pain.
she cried for verses lost to the valley of her strife
for missed opportunities and bro/ken hearts of iron.
their paths strayed along the leafy jungle of time
l i t t e r e
BrokenHave you eaten, child?

No my love, it's too soon.

Have you water?

No my love, I drank it all
in the night.

I would keep near while you
refill your cup.

I can wait.  I don't want the
water while you are here.

I should leave so you
will get your rest.

I will not rest if you go, for
I am broken with desire.

I will stop loving you.

I will go on loving you,
and
I always have.
The lick of the FlameMost people fear the wild flame.

Not I.

I long for the flame to lick my skin.

To warm my ever cold heart

and to give back the passion I once owned.

I long for the smoke to suffocate my misery

I long for the smoke  to fill my lungs

For it is thicker and sweeter than what air ever could be to me.

I long for the smoke to intoxicate my mind.

For the crackle of the flame to whisper sweetness to me.

As the flame takes over my heart.

I long for the burning lick of the flame.

To give back feeling.

To give back life.

In this hallow state,

I crave

To feel the bliss of the fervently flame.

To feel the pulsing of my heart once more.

I a
Send me awaySend me away
To a place not tracked my miles
I know you don't want me to stay
So maybe now you can finally smile

Send me away
Like everyone else has before you
I'll find a new place to lay
For what else is a broken man to do

Send me away
Yet again I will play as the fool
Tear up my heart just to play
Then toss me like a useless tool

Send me away
What more can you want from me
Your leaving my heart to decay
So just let go and leave me be

Send me away
Away so I can go back to being alone
Go back to being cast astray
And go back to a world without a home.
LossLoss

I have never felt this way before,
Completely and utterly empty,
I feel like my heart has been torn to shreds,
Leaving nothing but broken shards just like a hurricane does,

This pain, is a pain that has been torturing me,
It has been taking over my body for the past few days,
Slowly stripping the life out of me,
Leaving nothing but a dark empty shell,

I never imagined it could hurt so much to lose you,
Especially since I barely even knew you,
You were a role model for everyone,
And it rips me apart to know you're gone,

I know you're in a better place,
But something inside me still wishes you were here,
It killed me when I
What did I do?Honestly I don't know what to think anymore,
what parts of what I believe is really true.
Everyone is walking out the door,
I don't have a clue.

It makes me wonder,
about all the bad talk that could be going on.
If they bad talk the so called better people,
it makes me wonder all the bad they say about me.

What do they call me?
A bad friend? When I'm always there.
Desperate? When I only like one guy.
A downer? When I hide sadness around everyone.
A big mouth? When I listen to problems and not talk about mine.

These people are what I call "friends",
say they are there when they are not.
Luckily I still have a few friends,
that will help me
A Year AgoI can't believe it was a year ago,
that you stole my first kiss.
For once in a long time,
I felt wanted by some one.

A year ago I had my first date,
who really swept me off my feet.
You held me close,
and did not want to let go.

A year ago I was told I love you,
I told it right back to you.
I did not want to leave you,
but we had to go back to class.

Now back to the present,
to where you left me.
We hardly even talk,
just because out of no where,
you went and did this to someone else.
I don't like you and your skinny j-genesEverything's changed
Nothing is as before
I just
Don't recognize
Can't accept
Don't want to be
Who I am anymore.

Glass fattens
Shadows lie.
Mirrors, Cameras,
They all try
Repress me
Depress me
Force me to cry.
..........Silence be.
What voices are not.
Paper Hearts A clean sheet is how it starts,
An innocent life, with an unblemished heart
Pure bliss of a smile, happy affairs
A laugh, a giggle,
A world with no cares

But each day the paper ages
On it's surface, is found a new stain,
And each day the pencil moves,
All the paper feels is pain

The writer is not always the owner,
For the paper can be stolen from time, to time
And if you take the heart,
It will not come back unscarred

But the words can lie,
The heart can die
Rewrite the story,
Create a new life
Delusions of RealityFor many hours we spoke.
It came to me that perhaps
You were history repeating itself.
That maybe you weren't real-
Or I wasn't.
Either seemed more probable than
Some like you and someone like me
Actually being together.
So I debated,
And you replied,
Your answers were not as I expected
Lending credit to your claims.
Still,
The nagging doubt will exist,
Until the day we finally meet
Face to face,
Flesh to flesh.
Even then,
I might doubt.
After all,
Some hallucinations seem VERY real.
But even if you AREN'T,
Even if I am a figment of your imagination,
Or you of mine,
I hope you never vanish.
That we will always be at l
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More from ~Mustelidae22445

Mother Knows BestMy lips are chapped and numb,
About to fall off,
But mother knows best,
I play another song,
My stomach is growling,
The hunger will kill me,
But mother knows best,
I swallow the diet pill.
The boy is calling me over,
Wanting to have dinner,
Mother know everything,
I say yes.
Fallen AngelHer wings,
Once crystal-clear with innocence,
Now red with the blood of many.
She is fallen.
Her hair,
Once thick and fair,
Now gray and falling.
Falling, fading.
Her mind,
Once clean of any evil,
Now twisted and perverse.
She is failing.
All the good has gone with her,
Falling down to Earth,
Where her wings rip of and fall.
Fall upon the diseased soil.
She is fallen,
She is bad,
She is human in every way.
BoredI'm bored out of my wits,
Sitting here,
While the teacher prattles on,
Learning about nothing.
I watch the dust,
As it falls,
Sparkling in the sun of an open window,
And a daydream begins to form.
Knights,
Armor shining as they ride on steeds,
Into battle.
Princesses,
Their hair waving,
As they wait for the knights to save them.
One calls to me,
"Ms. Wang, what are you doing?"
And the daydream ends,
As I am cruelly hurled into reality.
My teacher is standing over me,
Red faced,
With a detention slip securely in one hand.
I gulp.
"You can be bored in detention, June."
InsomniacHow I long to close my eyes,
How I wish to fall into your embrace,
How I need to rest.
A pill might do the trick,
Or maybe some warm milk,
I don't care,
As long as I can sleep again.
Sea- Commision for HawkstarrYour rough,
Yet gentle.
Kind,
Yet fierce.
You are my home,
Without you,
I don't where I'd be.
I'd be lost without the sea.
Do You Know How Much I Hate You?Do you know how much I hate you?
You took everything from me,
My freedom,
My family,
My peace of mind.
Do you know how much I hate you?
You ruined my childhood,
The "happiest" years of my life,
Are now rubble.
The kid in me plays no more.
Do you know how much I hate you?
Every time I close my eyes,
Your smiling face is there,
Grinning and giggling,
At the tears that run down my cheeks.
Do you know how much I hate you?

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There are things no one sees

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November 11, 2012
Sta.sh Writer
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Comments: 29
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Views: 510 (0 today)
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Mommy Dearest

:iconmustelidae22445:

Mommy Dearest,
Mommy Dearest,
What did I do?

You hate me,
And I hate you.

Mommy Dearest,
Mommy Dearest,
What don't you know?

There's blood, so much blood,
From my wrists it flows.

Mommy Dearest,
Mommy Dearest,
What didn't you hear?

I was screaming in pain,
But all you did was leer.

Mommy Dearest,
Mommy Dearest,
Why can't you see?

I'm dead and dying,
With a heart full of misery.

Mommy Dearest,
Mommy Dearest,
I know you can tell.

I'm waiting for you,
In the deepest part of Hell.
:iconmustelidae22445:
For my friend, who's basically my sister. Her mother isn't to kind to her, and she resorted to cutting herself. She almost died, and is going through some rough times. I'm going to show this to her tomorrow, as poetry is the way I express my feelings the best.
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:iconjoli-hugh:
*Joli-Hugh Dec 26, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I really like this piece. Pure emotion is visible in the words.
Very creative, and I like how it is for a friend.

~Easily to relate to for me. When I cut, my Mom had no idea about it and mainly it was because of her and my father...
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:iconalexxrose123:
~AlexxRose123 Nov 12, 2012
Love it. I love it so much, this is how it is with my mother. She just doesn't understand.
It's hard growwin up, its hard and no one understand.
Most true Homestuck quote, from the saddest troll himself.
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:iconmustelidae22445:
~Mustelidae22445 Nov 12, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I'm glad you like it, thanks for the fave.
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:iconqihah:
~Qihah Nov 11, 2012
so deep!
Reply
:iconrandime:
~Randime Nov 11, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
My friend has the same issues with her dad, so when shes sad I show her silly songs on youtube!(she doesn't have a laptop)
Show your friend the song "Bananna Phone" its hilarious! It might cheer her up. :meow:
Reply
:iconmustelidae22445:
~Mustelidae22445 Nov 12, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I will, it seems really funny and my friend loves parodies.
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:iconsugar-thief:
*Sugar-Thief Nov 11, 2012
Damn, I miss reading literature here on DA. This was so sad yet brilliant <3
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:iconmustelidae22445:
~Mustelidae22445 Nov 12, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I'm glad you think so :D
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:iconindigogirl239:
~IndigoGirl239 Nov 11, 2012
This was very raw for me. I can't say I know what your friend is going through but I hope that she comes out of that dark place and your poem helps her see your worry for her
Reply
:iconspecsbroodking:
~specsbroodking Nov 11, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Wow. This is really powerful.
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